Spaghetti is Unbreakable
by SmoogCriminal
Summary: Josuke, shocked by the effects of Tonio's food on Okuyasu, decided to take matters into his own hands and investigate the next dish: spaghetti.


"I'm gonna fix fuck that spaghetti!"

The Joestar bloodline had always been built on an analyzing bizarre situations and pulling through them with wit, but when Josuke called out Crazy Diamond to hold a dish of spaghetti together, the integrity of being a JoJo suddenly came into question. He stood up, pushed the chair back, unbuckled his belt and dropped his baggy pants down. The familiar body heat formerly seeped into his clothes fell in exchange for cool afternoon air. It served to relax his lower muscles for the incoming workout.

Undressing in a public restaurant was already a brazen move and sex was going to be another can of worms. Okuyasu could only stare in disbelief as his friend's underwear etched itself in his mind. At first glance the underwear was ordinary male apparel; it was cotton white and held together by equally mundane straps. The lack of stains and overall sheen of the apparel indicated freshness, as if he'd take a shower prior to this and put on a fresh set. What struck out to him most, however, was the blue star woven on the fabric covering his penis.

"J-J-J-Josukeee?!" His shrill deep voice cried out to no avail, because he went on and threw his underwear down.

His full glory, uncircumcised with some stray hairs, was shamelessly in the proximity of his best friend. Even so, he simply responded with, "Calm down, Okuyasu. Something's not right with this spaghetti!"

Josuke was smart. That's what the other teenager continually thought ever since their friendship sprouted, but this? Was this some grand scheme to unravel the mystery, or did he just want to stick his dick in spaghetti? He wasn't content on interjecting, or really taking a second glance at his genitalia for that matter, so backed away from the table and covered his eyes. Kinkshaming never bode well; he'd heard of the foreign cult called Jonestown and their fate.

Josuke eyed the pasta and leaned closer. His phallus graced the silky tablecloth, making him shudder in pleasure at what would come next. He didn't realize the intricacies of the dish until now. How every flawless strand wove over each other, the golden ratio of tomato sauce evenly dispersed throughout that coated it a luxurious red, and the texture of every spherical meatball..

Shit. Looking down, he spotted the growing girth of his pride. For a high schooler, it was ordinary in shape and sanitation, being around five inches. Now on the edge of the plate, Josuke readied himself and Crazy Diamond for the first penetration. This was all to find the secret of Tonio's cooking, he declared mentally, and let out a grunt before going in.

If porn magazines taught him anything, it was the explosive gratification of ejaculation. Just now, as his foreskin dug into the saucy web of spaghetti, did he have to refrain himself from pre-ejaculation. He had no sexual experience before this, so when the thin pasta strands entrapped his penis in a twenty centimeter barrier and tugged at it, precum was quick to dribble from his head. In addition to that, the general weight of it made going in and out much more harder yet rewarding. The blend of his sperm and the natural tomato sauce made for zesty lubrication as he went in and out.

"G-greato daze!" He yelled, probably signaling Tonio that more than eating food was occurring in his restaurant.

For extended foreplay, he took his left hand and kneaded Crazy Diamond's armored crotch. The blunt feelings transferred to his own body, equivalent to playing with his testicles. Sweat slowly dripped down his pompadour and he bit his teeth at the dual satisfaction on his genitalia. With that hand occupied, Josuke decided to take things further and secure an impeccable climax. He stopped his strokes and wrestled out the metal fork earlier used by Okuyasu. Still groping his Stand, he wriggled his tomato-stained dick loose from the pasta and laid it below the fork, the cutlery now floating above the dish. He lowered it a little to reach the spaghetti and spun it around, twirling the strands and making them fly over his cock as well. Like a waterwheel, red sauce fell on his penis as well. Breath ragged and toes tightly curled white, he let out a raspy gasp and finally came. The pearly spunk colored some spaghetti in the sticky fluid, but the rest passed through the plate and stained some of the decor.

Immediately after spilling cum on the pasta, Tonio burst through the kitchen door before stopping at the unholy sight of Josuke fucking spaghetti. Okuyasu finally opened his eyes after the intercourse—albeit already scarred by the erotic noises of his friend—and looked at the chef before seeing a diminishing cock covered in tomato sauce and a short spaghetti strand. All parties were silent with their own horrified perspectives, and after what felt like a minute Okuyasu whispered.

"I.. uh.. wish The Hand could scrape my memories of this."


End file.
